Monthly Archives: June 2009

272

So apparently, even my tiny lil paragraph on MJ’s passing managed to offend someone. So much so that I was bombarded by offline msn messages. This is one of the few.

“I dont apreciate your post.. get ur facts right b4 u blab… he turned white bcoz he had a skin disease called Vitiligo. so the best he could do is go for a depigmentation.. theres pics of him during the period where his disease was at the peak and u could see white patches at several places of him. and the molestation thing was just blood suckers trying to rob michael. “

And even left a link to prove that said blood sucker admitted to it all.

Unfortunately, the link, doesn’t seem to get me anywhere. So too bad. No proof.

And just before anyone, or you, get all pissed at me for saying what I said, I never once mentioned that I hate MJ or anything right. All I said was that he died to me a long time ago. And therefore I do not feel the need to dedicate a whole post to him. Which I find myself doing right now. So much for what I stated there.

I do not question the mark he has left on the world. Even I know what a big difference he has made. So if I did offend you, I’d like to apologise for it. It was not an attack on your idol. Merely my opinion on the whole thing. Hugs and kisses aite =)

Boy turns (how old again?)

Here’s the long awaited update.

Coz well, I know I haven’t been updating.

Even though I’ve been going out practically everyday in the past month, the blog’s been pretty dead since I haven’t got an internet connection. It doesn’t feel the same blogging from the lappie when I’m sitting at starbucks or segafredo. Those places have been like a second home to me in recent times. Just sitting there hanging out with friends. Chilling and sipping on coffee.

I’ve also really picked up smoking again. (I hope my mum doesn’t read this part. If you have, ignore it okay mummy. And don’t read on. Hehe) I’m as close to chain smoking as I’ve ever been. And it’s not a good feeling. I don’t know why I’m so addicted to it now. Maybe coz it really is just relaxing. And I need to relax. Maybe it’s coz smoking makes me sleepy. And i’ve been having problems sleeping again. And that’s why knowing that I smoke because of those said reasons, leaves me feeling SO not good. But ehh. It helps me thru the day. So i’ll worry about the lung cancer and stuff some other day.

Spent the last weekend in KL. Partying my ass off in style. Lol. Okay. So I was actually there for a friend’s birthday. And it’s been quite a while since I’ve enjoyed myself that much. And no I DID NOT GET DRUNK. OR HIGH. OR ANYTHING ELSE. It was just good clean fun. Although the pictures I post up of it a little later on would make it seem like I was not. I’m swearing here that I was. Haha. I’m really missing KL now. But the feeling comes and goes. It’s been that way for the longest time. I guess I just miss the hecticness of it all. Having to go out everyday. Clubbing. Shopping. Hanging out. And even though I’m kinda doing some of that here. It just doesn’t feel the same.

I still think of you all the time. And everything we’ve been through together. And how stupid it is that all of that turned out to be for nothing. I know we’re friends now. But what if I’m really not okay with us being friends? We never learnt to be friends in the first place. How do I go from here to there? It was so much easier when you just chose to ignore me the first time. I wish I could tell you to just do that, coz I know you would. But it just wouldn’t be the same this time. And I just really don’t know what to do.

I’ve lost you. I’ve lost them. And that’s what sucks the most. Coz when you were finally given the chance to prove yourself to be what you’ve always claimed to be, you went and did the exact opposite. You said a long time ago, if you could take back what happened then or at least do it differently, you would. And then you didn’t. And now I suffer again, coz of choices that you had to make. It’s in huge part my own choice too. But I always knew I couldn’t do it alone. And so did you.

Oh and since everyone seems to be blogging about MJ and stuff, I figured it’d only be appropriate for me to mention him a little here. Yes I know he’s the King of Pop. And he did die and all. But I don’t feel the need to have a whole post dedicated to him now. He died a long time ago to me. When he turned completely white and had his nose fall off. Don’t even get me started on the child molestation. So yeah. Doesn’t affect me much. It’s just a pity he had to die before his last curtain call. But no biggie. Not like I was gonna be there anyways.

So I guess I’ma end this here. I’ll post up pics of my weekend in KL soon. Once I get em and edit everything to freakin perfection. I’ll try to update soon again. But if I don’t. Be understanding okay. Hehe. And you’re allowed to guestblog if you want to. Yes, you.

not over you

In light of recent events, I have come to realise that I am not over you yet.
It has not been easy dealing with things being this way. But I just know that there’s nothing I can do at all at this point. We’re friends. And i’m happy being friends. I’m glad you were there this weekend, to offer some support after what happened. Eventhough nothing was mentioned about it. Not once.
But this weekend has just made me realise that I do miss you. That no one can take your place. No matter how hard I try to let them in. Moving on is a whole different thing from letting go. Moving on is easy. Letting go, not so much.
I asked you. And you gave me the answer I expected to hear all along.
It’s not impossible, does not make things any easier for me. In fact, all it does is leave me wondering more. If there’s anything I should do or not do that would affect the outcome of the future. Mine. Yours. Ours. Which puts me back at square one.
I am happy. At times.
But then more often than not, I am reminded of how much happier I could be. And that is the problem.
I hope going to India solves everything. It is the break I need. The good kind.

Spammers. God!

Spammers fucking annoy me.
And now that i’m not online all the time, it annoys me so much more. To get on my page and see crap. Then to have to sign on to the account just to erase it. Do you think I can’t check IP adresses? Are you that stupid to assume I don’t know who you are? Yes, YOU. Fucking childish. I thought I was done dealing with you, but apparently not.
If I weren’t on my cycle now, maybe. Just maybe. I wouldn’t be so pissed off. But your timing is as bad as your attitude. And your face.
Fucking leave my page alone.

Long Overdued

No I haven’t forgotten. I just haven’t been online much.