I’m off on a holiday. Trying to relax.
But somehow, with everything that’s been going on, the thought of you has found it’s way back into my head. It sucks that this, reminds me of that. In so so many ways.
And I thought I’d gotten over missing you.
It’s okay I guess. It’s not like thinking of you is killing me. It’s just a constant reminder of how I felt, and how I’m gonna feel again after this. It gives me that urge to put a stop to all of this before I hurt myself once more. But then, I’ve never been smart enough to do that have I?
This isn’t going to end well. And like the last time, I’m not gonna be able to take it. That’s when I’ll break down. The way I used to so often when you walked away.
He’s walking away.
I know it.
I just don’t know how to turn my back on him first.
I’ve never checked out on love before.