I should put my thoughts to paper. And start writing a book on failed relationships. The only problem is, I don’t know how to pinpoint what went wrong, or how to do anything different really. So I guess there’d be no point then. Or it could be like a “here’s what I did, don’t do it” kinda thing. Lol. I wish someone would give me a guide to all this shit.
Time and time again I get criticism from people who think they know me, or are just nosy and need to kill time. I get judged getting into relationships and not taking it slow. For being proud and happy of who I’m with. For the simple fact that when it comes to temporary boyfriends or relationships that did not last, my list might seem a little long. Fact is, I’ve been in love 3 times. Out of those relationships, I ended none of em. I’ve been guilty of ending other little relationships, but I guess it works that way. When the guy loves me more than I love him, I walk away. When I love him more than he loves me, he walks away. Why do relationships work that way? Why can’t all this be easier?
I guess what I want those people who don’t me to know is that I’m just a normal girl. Trying to figure things out. Sure I make mistakes along the way. And of course not everyone would agree with what I’m doing with my life. But it is what I want to do, with my own life. I do not try to tell other people how to live. Or judge them much on the decisions they make, so is it unfair of me to expect that in return?
I think I heard this on One Tree Hill some time back. Every song ends. Is that any reason not to enjoy the music? That’s how I’m choosing to look at life. And I’m gonna continue to try to enjoy whatever happiness I have while I have it. So what if almost every good thing comes to an end? I’m taking risks, coz at some point, I’m gonna come across the one good thing that stays. It’d be nice to know that people out there understand. But it’s okay if you don’t. Just try to keep those nasty opinions to yourself. I’m not asking for it right now.