i have always sucked at making money. because of that, i have been judged as lazy, unmotivated, ambition-less. i wish to clear something up today. it is not that i can’t push myself to make money. i just simply choose not to.
i choose instead, to focus on the simpler things in life. i want to work on being content with less and less until someday i do not feel the desire to have material possessions. that doesn’t mean i’d throw everything in a bin. of course i’d treasure what i already have, i just don’t want to dedicate my life to the constant chase of a misdirected idea of success and stability.
i don’t want anyone to think it’s easy. consciously knowing and accepting that doing what i love comes with financial instability is scary. trying to live with less is a tough journey; one that takes a lot of determination in the current society we live in. everyone’s always striving to be able to afford more. beauty enhancements, outrageous holidays, better gadgets, more luxuries, nicer cars, bigger houses and the list is never ending.
removing the desire to have everything and more is torturous in ways. some part of me does want all the riches in the world. but the one thing i do have that keeps me on track is love. who i love, what i love, why i love, how i love.
i’ve thought about it hard. at the end of this lifetime (and any other), i don’t think it would matter what i owned or how much there is saved up in my bank.
it would matter to me what i spend my life doing. how hard i struggle to fight the currents of the mainstream society to stay true to myself. the hurdles that i jump over. how much i continuously grow. what experiences i share and lessons i pass on. how i love. how many bonds i forge with the people i love. how many bonds i forge with strangers. and most importantly, how sincere and unselfish my intentions are in doing anything i do.
with that i hereby state –
i do not dream of rainbowed being a successful “business” someday. the stuff i sell there is frequently under-priced for the amount of effort i put into it. and as it continues to grow, i will find ways to shrink the prices instead of charging people more until the day i can give everything away for free. i do not want to “get rich or die trying”.
my true goal with rainbowed is to use it as a channel to spread love and flood the world with colours in the hope that people will in turn let their true colours shine more brightly too; and pass it forward. for that reason, i hope my audience and reach grows because slowly but surely, if i choose to use what little influence i have in a positive way on my surroundings, my surroundings will change.
so yes, i will continue to suck at making money. and i will be proud of that because money doesn’t matter. money doesn’t matter one bit. there is so much more in life that we could be doing. and that’s the path i will always choose (: