tomorrow i turn 25. in some ways that feels like stepping into the second quarter of my life – even though i don’t actually want to live to a hundred. 25’s also the age my mum was when she had me. times have certainly changed because i don’t think i’m in a place where i want to have children just yet. in fact, i can’t say for sure if i know that i even do want to have children. the idea of adopting is becoming more appealing as time goes by – and maybe that’s what i want to do instead someday. so many children in the world without love. so much love i can give. that sounds like a match made in heaven.
the past year has been one of extreme growth for me. it hasn’t always been bright and colourful, but the tough challenges are what made me that much wiser. nowadays, i have so much to be grateful for. lovely parents who love me, friends who enjoy my company, a place to call home, a wonderful partner. my awareness has expanded, my perspectives changed, my heart loves more, my soul is more at peace. i also know myself more now than ever before and understand a purer purpose to my existence. so many things have been sorted out that now, all that’s left to do is focus on achieving our goals and living to love.
as for my birthday present to myself this year, i am quitting smoking. i have already quit drinking and now i’m adding this to the list. i’m not a heavy smoker to begin with and i haven’t been smoking for long at all, but this pointless habit that surrounds my life has really been bugging me and i figured it feels like the best time now to say enough is enough. everyone chooses to live life a different way and i have always allowed myself to feel like being around people who smoke is a reasonable enough excuse for me to smoke because it’s so hard to have “temptation” in your face 24/7. but who are we kidding here? no excuse is a good enough excuse for me to be doing something i don’t even want in my life. and i am dedicated as hell when i set my mind to things, so here’s goodbye to stupid pointless cigarettes! i never liked you to begin with and i doubt i’m gonna be missing you.
now on to the next phase of my life! i wonder what stories i will have to tell as i turn 50 someday. so much to look forward to! :D