Category Archives: STUFF I WRITE

Spring Cleaning

Well, not really. The family house that all the junk I’ve collected over the years is stored in, was sold to new owners and my grandmother told me that they might have to find somewhere else to stay, so I’d have to get rid of my stuff. After sorting through everything, I read the new landlord’s agreement and found out that shifting won’t be necessary. 
Being the stubborn and sentimental person I am, I’ve barely allowed myself to throw clothes out in the past. I merely stuffed them into baskets/boxes and put them aside. Don’t know why I ever thought that was a solution when I’d have to sort through it eventually. Maybe I thought the house would just be here forever and I could leave it there to collect dust til the end of time. 
I guess I decided it finally was time to stop avoiding the inevitable and sort them into piles. Some pieces were just harder to say goodbye to. 
Like the tshirt I wore on the day that I lost my virginity. 

So I took a shitload of photos! 
Coz that way I get to be delusional and tell myself I didn’t completely throw em away.
 

Favourite cut-up boyfriend tshirt (something I do all the time) and superfavourite jeans that became superfavourite shorts. I think the damage itself shows how much I loved it.

An assortment of tshirts collected all through my school and working years. In any other situation, I’d hold on to these just because they’re all in proper condition and more importantly, irreplaceable. But I move way too much and I simply don’t have the extra space in my luggage to take these along. 

Piles on the left are my efforts in trying to be charitable by donating clothes to other people who might appreciate it. And the huge mountain of clothes on the right is shit I’m throwing away. I can’t believe I ever thought there was a point in holding on to clothes I already felt the need to put away back then. 

From now on, I’m going through my clothes at least once a year and getting rid of shit I don’t need. Having a little extra closet space is always good because that’s the best time to go out shopping again.

Contacts

I’ve never liked the fact that I don’t have perfect vision. In fact, if there was one thing I could change about myself, it’d be just that. But seeing as how I don’t have a genie to grant me one wish or magical powers to do that for myself, I depend a whole lot on contact lenses. They’re useful for all occasions. No glasses falling off when I go running. Or glasses getting in the way of me looking good for a night out. That’s the reason I’ve been wearing them since I was 16. 
Used to be more expensive back then. But now thanks to Polkadotz Lens, lenses are way more affordable at only RM 17 a pair. 
Here are some photos of me wearing their Mavis Grey pair.
Go ahead and check out their facebook page now.

Earthquake?

So I actually felt my whole room shake just a while ago. Took me a couple of seconds to realise my laptop was moving a little. Tried to focus on the screen, but it felt weird. Then I figured it was my mind or body playing tricks on me coz it’s been a long day. It wasn’t til I looked at my wall and saw the lanyards on it swaying a little that it hit me, this must be an earthquake nearby. 
I don’t mean get-in-the-car-and-go-for-a-drive nearby. I mean on-the-same-continent nearby. 
Orange earthquake alert in Northern Sumatera, Indonesia. 6.5 on the richter scale. I think that’s it. Nothing much out about it yet, but I’m praying for the many people who’s lives are gonna be affected by this. 

Malaysia’s really well protected, we’ve only felt a couple of extremely minor tremors over the past few years. All of which I woke up the next morning to discover I slept through. So yeah, this is different for me. I can not begin to imagine what the people there are going through :(

Friends With Benefits

Won tickets for the movie premiere. Obviously over here. I doubt they’re even allowed to show this in Malaysian cinemas. Lol.

Not bad for a romantic comedy. Interesting and entertaining cast and some scenes are hilarious. But I found all the mocking they did of “romantic comedy cliches” completely ridiculous coz Friends With Benefits turned out to be exactly just that. For those of you who watched…
…yeah, kinda the same thing.

But I would say, watch it. Just coz you get to see Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis in underwear. A lot.

Another lesson learnt.

I’ve never really been my own person before. For such a long time, I was always just “someone’s girlfriend”. Sure I say I’ve been independent. But in the sense that I don’t depend on my parents to take care of me. Or that I don’t actually stay at home with a family. But like I said, I’ve always been a girlfriend. I’ve moved away from home for the boyfriend. Changed cliques of friends for that reason too and basically readjusted everything to them. I’ve ignored my own friends at times because I get so caught up playing the part of “a girlfriend” and I forget to do things for myself. 
Whether it was intentional or not at those points, I can’t really remember. But I know I’ve always been willing to make those changes because I’ve always felt like I needed someone around who actually cared about me. 
How wrong was I?!

What on earth has any guy ever done but cause more drama in my life. It’s not like any of them have ever moved to where I was to be with me. It was never expected, coz I don’t mind moving. I adapt to new places pretty easily. But none of them have asked me to move to where they were and provided me a place to stay. No. They ask, then I figure the rest out on my own. I’ve never been with a guy who’s worked his ass off to take care of me either. There are things I have done that I wouldn’t be proud of, but not once have I dated a guy because he had money. 

I’ve always just wanted love. It’s the one thing that’s been missing from my life and I’ve been so willing to sacrifice everything else just to get it from a boyfriend. And at the end of the day, I didn’t even get that. 
I was once on the right track. I had passion, a goal, and the drive to push myself to do better in life. Then I got all stupid. Well, time to unstupify myself! Enough with guys. 
I have friends. Amazing friends who make time for me, offer me support when I’m down, let me into their lives, open up their homes to me when my boyfriend (whichever one) can’t. And on top of that, they give endless reasons to laugh and be happy. Why the hell have I not seen that before?

Between them and myself, I have all that I need to be okay. My life doesn’t need to revolve around some guy. And I can definitely function without being a girlfriend. Of course someday I’ll reach a point where I’d want that again. But I don’t want to allow myself to get there anytime soon. I’ve been single for 4 months now. That’s longer than the combined amount of time I’ve been single over the past 6 years. God. 6 years. Has it really been that long?

2011 has been a significant year to me so far. I’ve learnt to be a better friend, to be more positive about life, to be on my own. And now I just have to push myself to do things because I want to do it for myself, and not coz someone expects me to. I’m not gonna fool myself into believing that this is the end of life’s problems. Life’s a never-ending journey. But years from now, I get to look back and know that I took a big step right around now. And as long as I continue to grow, things should turn out alright.